Divorcing can be less traumatic if you seek the help of a family mediator to reach an agreement in which both parties see your wishes reflected.
Divorcing is a painful, expensive and complicated step, although it is less so since the reform of the law. Then the obligation to go through a process of separation before divorce is being slowly phased out, and a new figure is being created, mediation, designed to help solve the divorce in the least controversial way possible.
Most states have been developing and defining more precisely the figure of mediation so that this service is provided with nuances in each of them. But the results pursued by mediation are the same everywhere:
- Reduce the emotional and economic damages resulting from divorce.
- Protect the interests of minors who may be involved.
- Minimize the disagreements between the couple, creating the conditions for dialogue and communication.
What Really Happens
Mediation is a process in which the couple who is going to divorce is being mediated by a third party to establish by agreement to the terms of their divorce, with the help of a mediator and without the need to go to a trial where it would be the judge who would make the decisions.
If the mediation is fruitful and the members of the couple reach an agreement, the mediator will draft a document that expresses it. This document, a draft regulatory agreement, will then have to be attached to the divorce petition filed with the courts and will be examined by a judge, who will ensure that the law is respected and that none of the parties involved (spouses or children, if any) has been harmed.
If the judge approves and approves it, the agreement will have the same validity as if it had been issued by the judge after a contentious process.
Mediation is supervised by a qualified person (mediator) to guide two people who have difficulty understanding solutions that satisfy both as much as possible and respect legality.
The law requires the mediator to be active and to be impartial and neutral. That is to say, that the person is not a mere spectator, but must stimulate and direct the negotiations, without taking sides and without imposing its own solutions. In addition, the mediator is required to maintain confidentiality about the process and to be faithful to the task.
If these principles are not followed, and damages and losses are derived for other persons, the injured parties may demand compensation for civil liability. The law also requires that the mediator be specifically qualified to mediate.
The regulations are more precise and require specific degrees, which vary from one to another: degree in law, psychology or pedagogy, diploma in social work, social education…
You can contact attorneys Holly Davis & Chris Kirker to meditate on your issues.
Benefits of Mediation
The agreements obtained under the auspices of a mediator have many advantages:
Having a mutually agreeable arrangement is less traumatic, as each party sees its wants will be reflected to some extent. This favors the fulfilment of the agreements, which nevertheless fails more frequently when the judge decides for the contenders, especially what they previously shared (property, housing, business and, above all, children), leaving none satisfied.
The agreement is normally reached in a short period although that varies from one region to another, and also the length of issues to mediate.
Mediation usually makes divorce a lot cheaper, at least when compared to contentious processes, in which each spouse needs a lawyer and a solicitor. There are no pre-fixed rates, but they are agreed in advance with those who request it. The usual thing is that the price varies depending on the number of sessions needed to reach an agreement, how many professionals intervene, etc.